Saturday, April 08, 2006

Tired...

This 1 wk seemed to be dragging and I'm really glad tt [Sat]'s finally here... Happiness seemed to have taken a wk off from visiting me and I'm like suffering from [Weekday Blues]...

Who wouldn't be down after the release of the [Common Test] results??? Who would still be in the mood when the loss of an 'A' Level subject or flunking your subjects are so real??? Who would still be thinking of fun when teacher after teacher are showing you the same overall performance graph and tt your class on the whole's under-performing??? As much as I tried to block out those negative feelings like a firewall blocking spam webbie, the negativity still seeped into me, draining me...

All this while, after my promos, I've always wondered why the senoirs always complain tt life's tough and it's hard, how they scored 'F's in every subject in their Common Test... I was baffled by their poor performance... <39!!! How can 1 score tt low for a paper???

But after the Common Test, I realised tt the same scenario could happen to me as well... It just hasn't happen yet... The close call of almost not getting an average 'C' shocked me... All this while, there're instances whereby I didn't do well for certain tests and I know the reason... Didn't study, didn't finish on time... But this time round, both my Chem and Phy grades are atrocious (to me tt is)... Maybe it's because I didn't experience this before... But this fall has made me lose my confidence and has completely demoralised me...

I feel weary... How I wish tt I could just stone 24/7... Even now I have lose my drive for [MS]... The element of fun just isn't there anymore... And come to think of it, I hardly feel any fun now... With the stress-o-metre reaching 10, my productivity's dipping to a 0...

*Sigh* This entry's seriously depressing... Hoped tt the next entry will be something less mundane... 6 more days till ECP!!!

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