I didn't expect the walls tt I've erected to protect myself from the likes of [Jeffrey] and company to have holes... For this, I only have myself to blame as I've been hiding in my own cubby hole since [J1], so it's really obvious tt the walls need maintainence...
Apparently, I was in the same team as Collegue A for a project... I knew I was in a team but I didn't contribute a single effort for the project... So when Collegue A gave me a cert for it, I didn't brag or anything... I simply accepted the cert and continued working... It's only @ a later time of the day tt Collegue B told me what Collegue A complained abt to his other collegues, tt Collegue B and I didn't do anything yet we still get the same 'payouts' as the rest...
I admit tt I didn't contribute... But then again, how can I be expected to do something when no one told me to do anything??? Nor told me what the project was going to be abt??? To blatantly accuse me of free-loading and not speak the whole truth reminds me of how I was tormented by [Jeffrey] and company's half-truth...
Huh... To think tt after 5 yrs, history repeats itself... I was once again betrayed by someone whom I treat as a friend... How can I be so stupid as to actually be so trusting and not learn from my past mistakes???
It's thanks to guys like them tt made me wary of befriending guys... I do not want to be judged again... Neither do I want to be betrayed by those homophobes... Sheesh!!! What's wrong with having an alternate lifestyle?! In case you haven't notice, being gay does not mean tt I will like any and every guy tt I see... Even if I were to like a certain guy, only idiots would openly display their affection to said guy...
Sickening toads...
Speaking of liking a guy... It's only my wishful thinking @ work yet again to think tt I could've met a guy tt's interested in me and naive to believe tt I could find love via online dating... Stupid, stupid, stupid...
*Take deep breaths*
I let fate decide when it's time... It's pointless to rush such things when I'm not even emotionally ready... As to when I'll ever be ready, I reckon it'll be when I've finally become more outgoing and have lost interest in gaming, which I doubt will be happening anytime in the near future... Haha... I wonder when my [Cupid] is ever going to master his archery...
