Friday, March 03, 2006

Outflow Of Emotions...

There's a limit to everything... Like a bottle tt has a fixed amt of H2O tt it can store, a human shell also has a capacity to how much it can absorb... Once, tt threshold level is exxceed, the human shell burst apart, releasing whatever tt it has kept locked up for eons...

After watching the trailers of [BrokeBack Mountain] in [youtube.com], I finally realised why it's rated [R21]... When I stumble across the kissing scene of the 2 male leads, I guess my naive mind can't fully understand it and there's this sense of weirdness after viewing it... Of course, this feeling soon dissipated... In tt short trailer, you can really see the hesitation on [Jake] as [Ennis] tried to kiss him... Yet the hesitation was totally gone once their lips made contact and firey passion exploded... It's remarkable tt [Jake] didn't get freaked out by his best friend's move... How I wish tt tt could really happen in my life... To be able to find tt special guy...

Aparting from fantasing abt tt for 1 whole week, I still have a [Chem SPA] to handle and seriously, science practical has now taken a whole new meaning... In the past, we have to do the exp. in order to get the answer, evident in our QA and titration exp, where we mix all different sorts of chemicals to see some colourful precipitate which I don't know how to differentiate... now, all we have to do is to memorise - yes, MEMORISE - the answer given to us by the teacher and literally vomit it all out back to the teacher... Now why is tt happening??? This is because we're being tested on Skills C - calculations - and D - evaluation... For evaluation, we simply have to find out what's wrong with the exp, it's impacts and how we can improve the exp... And pior to the actual SPA, the sch will obviously get us to do similar exp and tell us the evaluations, which for the record, is totally congruent to what we'll write in the actual SPA... Thus, it's almost impossible to fail such SPA and it's a must to score in order to gain leverage in the 'A's...

Amazing infomation aside, it's time for a little bit of solem news... I recently got back my [Chinese] results... No, I didn't fail... I pass... I managed to obtain a C5, which isn't tt good seriously... But considering tt my target's a pass... I'm more than satisfied... And don't bother proposing the idea of re-takign the exams... I'll ought to be thrown into the lonney bin if I were to really do tt... @ tt same time, the 'A' level results are out and the really senior [Pioneers] retunred to obtain their precious result slips... Saw most of the guys donning a cap and I don't know how they can do it... To look cool and good-looking while being bald @ the same time... If I were really to lose all my hair, I'll wear and won't even look @ myself in the mirror, let alone step outta my house... Even [SL] commented tt he'll wear a hat if he's to shave his hair...

It's [WQ]'s b-day on [Thurs] and I went to dine with the all-girls group @ [Let's Eat] once again... It's enjoyable and memorable as it's 1 unforgettable day... [WQ]!!! May your wishes come true so tt there's world peace!!!

Then today's our ex-CT's wedding solemisation ceremony in the evening but I didn't turn up for tt event... Despite [Ms. Lee] being our CT for the past 1 yr, I'm not obliged to attend the ceremony right??? What's more, I do not really look forward to attending such events as I find it uninteresting... To me, staying @ home the ideal choice when it comes to going out late @ night... I would rather play [MS]... Kinda unfeeling right??? I think so too... Guess it's the reprecussion of sealing my emotions and locking it up in my already solidifed heart...

And just not so long ago, I was told tt the ice-skating outing tt I anticipated is being brought forward from the [March] hols to tml... I can't really make it tml as I'm plannign to study tml... Tt change of plans has totally ruined 1 hr of my life by being upset and emotional... Guess I can't really hold onto anymore emotions in me and what ever tt is being thrown in my way is immediately reflected back...

Now some may wonder why am I kicking up a big fuss over not attending some outing... As a matter of fact, they're the bulk of what I would classify as 'close friends' - ppl who you'll share almost everything with... And after not meeting up with them for who knows how long, I kinda miss joking with them... Guess I'm afraid of losing contact with them and moving on with my life... I fear the constant change tt's happening all around us...

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